Tonight

Kanina, habang naghihintay kaming mag FinAcc, edi tambay mode. Tapos kaming dalawa ni Trishia (and from here on out a.k.a. bespren), nakikinig ng music sa iPod ko. Hindi ko na maalala kung paano kami napunta sa usapan na iyon, pero napag-usapan namin yung kanta ng FM Static na Tonight. 

 

AKO: Sinulat niya yan para sa kapatid niya eh. 

BESPREN: Sa kapatid ba niya? Akala ko sa girlfriend niya. Diba nga 9/11

AKO: Sa kanya ba? Wait nga, pakinggan natin. (Plays Tonight) Meron dito yung eight… Ano ba yun? 

♫ I remember the time you told me about when you were eight…

BESPREN: Tamo. Hindi sila magkapatid. Kung magkapatid yan, edi hindi na magkukwento kasi alam na niya yung buhay niyan kung kapatid niya. 

AKO: Oo nga…

♫ I remember the time you sat and told me about your Jesus

AKO: Oo nga, tamo magkaiba sila ng religion. Kinukwento pa nung babae yung Jesus niya. 

BESPREN: Ayan, tsaka di nila pag-uusapan yung Jesus kung magkapatid sila kasi pareho na sila ng relihiyon… atheist ata yung lalaki eh.

AKO: Baka hindi naman. Baka yung religion nila iba lang yung paniniwala. Diba may religion na separate si God, si Jesus, tsaka Holy Spirit parang catholic. Tapos meron naman, one true God lang. Baka ganun. Yung Jesus kasi natin half human…

BESPREN: Half God. OH MY GHAD! DEMIGOD SI JESUS!!!

BOTH: (insert series of WAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA!’s here)

AKO: MINDFUCKED! 

 

 

But to answer your question (and because I researched it), tungkol nga ata talaga ito sa girlfirend niya. Although may nagsasabing tungkol ito sa lil bro niya. Pero kung basa sa analyzation namin ni Bespren, mukhang sa GF niya ang. AND WAIT! THERE’S MORE! Apparently, 9/11 was supposed to be their wedding day. So baka yung line na “the car you were last seen in” was her bridal carriage. Awwww… UNNNGGGHHH! The feels! Mas ramdam ko na tuloy yung kanta ngayon. Parang ang fresh uli ng wound (kahit na hindi ako yung nawalan). Pero isipin niyo na lang. Konti na lang, KONTING KONTI na lang!!! UNNNGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! 

Constant State of Denial

Seriously, I am the kind of person who is in a constant state of denial. Especially when it comes to my studies. It’s kind of a very bad habit because instead of studying (like what I should be doing now), I tend to ignore it and log on to the numerous social networking sites I have. It’s totally frustrating.

Enough

Sometimes, all the jokes can take its toll and sooner or later, they become sharp objects that can pierce through you and suddenly they are not jokes anymore. For you they become serious stuff and eventually, it gets to your head and makes you feel as if people have done a number on you. It makes you wonder if the taunts and the jokes have some personal grudge underneath and that’s the reason why they keep on messing with you.

I guess I let people get away of making fun of me that they think it’s okay to do it all the time, not knowing that it hurts me.

I can’t even give them a piece of my mind. That’s just me, though. I keep on suffering in silence when I could always always tell them to stop.

I just want them to stop.

I’m trying to write more on Wattpad. I’m committing to this. If I can’t even commit, I’m going to kill myself. (Don’t be alarmed. That was just an expression).   BTW: Check out a short story of mine. 🙂 It’s called Down the Aisle.