Too Open

Sometimes it’s hard meeting people and leaving your heart too open for them to see. It’s so hard being transparent. It’s so hard being noticed. It’s so hard giving them your all. It’s so hard being nice.

But on second thought, it’s actually easy. It’s easy to leave your heart open to people. To be transparent, to be noticed, to give your all, to be nice. The only thing hard about all of this is having people take advantage of the ease of things.

And then after you’ve welcomed them into your heart, when they have already settled there and made a certain portion of it theirs, they start to break you. You think that being yourself around them is already okay since you think they’ve already accepted you as you are but then one thing happens and… that’s it. You’re through. It’s like what you had with them was just an illusion in your head, as if it never happened at all. 

What’s worse is the fact that they think they have the right to be the one who should be angry. 

It’s really hard to please different kinds of people. I don’t even know why I try. 

My heart is too open. Too open for entries. Too open for exits. Too open for happiness. Too open for hurt. Mostly hurt. Because in the end, a heart too open leaves a gaping hole when nothing else is in it. When everything and everyone is gone, what’s left of my heart? That’s right… hurt. Because a hole so big is so hard to cure. Maybe even impossible. 

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